Script for a 22-page Story

by Randy & Jean-Marc LOFFICIER

The homeworld of the WATCHERS. We are inside the TEMPLE OF JUSTICE once seen in CAPTAIN MARVEL #39 (see reference). The Great Hall is empty, except for a TRIO OF WATCHERS. One of them (EMNU) is standing in front of a spherical hologram floating in mid-air. It shows the F.F. confronting the DARK RAIDER, while the Watcher UATU stands behind them -- as shown on page 18 of F.F. #392 (see reference). The other two WATCHERS (ATUL and INGU) are entering the room -- one is gliding down, the other one is materializing out of thin air.

ATUL: Why have you summoned us so urgently from the far end of the Universe, EMNU?

ATUL: (CNTD) Have the N'GARAI broken out of their dominion? Or is a new PLAGUE threatening our race?

INGU: I, for one, was observing the emergence of a MOST PROMISING race in the AAKON star sector, and long to return to it!

EMNU: I have called you to sit in judgment of one of our own. One who has ONCE AGAIN transgressed our MOST SACRED oath --

EMNU: -- But before we can assess his GUILT -- and PUNISHMENT -- we must answer a question --

-- WHAT IF THE FANTASTIC FOUR HAD BEEN DEFEATED BY THE DARK RAIDER?

CREDITS.

Panel 1:

The three WATCHERS observe the scene which happened in F.F. #392, page 23, panel 3 (see reference), or a variation thereof: SUE has succeeded in trapping the DARK RAIDER in her force field, while FRANKLIN has recovered the ULTIMATE NULLIFIER. BEN (not in the original, but add him in) stands to the side.

EMNU: Behold an insane REED RICHARDS, the sole survivor of a reality where Earth was ravaged by planet-devouring GALACTUS!

EMNU (CNTD): Know that this self-styled DARK RAIDER is himself the product of our brother UATU's tampering! *

SUE: WE DID IT! His ability to concentrate wavered long enough for us to make our move!

FRANK: We have the NULLIFIER!

RAIDER: It appears I underestimated your intelligence, Susan!

RAIDER: But I will never REST until I have successfully eradicated every REED RICHARDS in creation --

RAID (CNTD): -- And YOU as well!

FTNOTE: * : As revealed in the classic F.F. #392 -- ED.

In the hologram, UATU speaks. This is basically the same as F.F. #392, page 23, panel 5.

UATU: He is CORRECT.

UATU: No matter HOW or WHERE he is imprisoned, a man of his vast intellect will eventually devise a means to ESCAPE!

In the hologram, SUE now pleads with UATU. This is the same as the last panel of page 23 of F.F. #392.

SUE: You can’t possibly SUGGEST--! Even knowing what he’s done... We don’t KILL our enemies! We’re not MURDERERS!

FRANK: Maybe the Watcher's RIGHT! He's a menace to the entire Multiverse!

RAIDER: HA! That's more like the girl I remember! Compassionate to the bitter end!

Panel 4:

EMNU throws his right arm in the air in anger, or shame. Inside the hologram, UATU reaches a decision. Use a long shot of the first panel on page 26 of F.F. #392.

EMNU: The Earth Woman's pleas fall on DEAF ears. Watch in SHAME as our brother breaks his SACRED OATH!

UATU: I feared you would have such a reaction! The FANTASTIC FOUR have always maintained a high standard of morality...

UATU: But after endless centuries of inaction, the time for passive observation must come to an abrupt END --

LARGER PANEL of UATU blasting the DARK RAIDER. This is substantially the same panel as panel 2 of page 26 of F.F. #392, except that BEN should be in the shot, positioned to the right.

UAT (BURST): -- AND THE WATCHER MUST NOW ACT!SUE: NO!!

SUE (CNTD, SMALL PRINT): How could you?

Panel 1:

Emphasis on the three WATCHERS conferring. The hologram is "frozen" on the scene shown in the last panel.

ATUL: UATU has been judged for such TRANSGRESSIONS before * ...

INGUL: Yet, his wisdom is legend! I CANNOT believe that one such as he would undertake such a course LIGHTLY!

INGUL (CNTD): We must indeed know MORE!

EMNU: Unlike the Ephemerals, we Watchers are UNIQUE. We have NO COUNTER-PARTS elsewhere in the multiverse...

FTNOTE: * : In CAPTAIN MARVEL #39 -- ED.

MEDIUM SHOT of EMNU, standing in front of one of the Temple's weird sculptures.

EMNU: Our actions are IMMUTABLE -- unyielding rocks in the EVER-CHANGING seas of time. What UATU has done can NO LONGER be changed!

EMNU: However, it is within our power to create a SIMULACRUM UNIVERSE...

STAT here panel 3 of the previous page.

CAP (EMNU): "...One where the Earthwoman's eloquence will SWAY Uatu!"

SUE: You can’t possibly SUGGEST--! Even knowing what he’s done... We don’t KILL our enemies! We’re not MURDERERS!

FRANK: Maybe the Watcher's RIGHT! He's a menace to the entire Multiverse!

RAIDER: HA! That's more like the girl I remember! Compassionate to the bitter end!

CLOSE-UP on UATU's face, as shown in panel 4 of the previous page, but this time with an expression of sorrow rather than of murderous resolution on his face.

UATU: NO! I see that Sue Richards speaks the TRUTH! Shall I now become a MOCKERY of all which I hold DEAR?

UATU: I was sorely tempted to break my Oath -- but NO LONGER!

Same scene as panel 5 of the previous page, except that, this time, UATU is shown partly transparent as he dematerializes -- like in the last panel of page 27 of F.F. #392.

UATU: FAREWELL, MY FRIENDS! The Ultimate Nullifier will be returned to its rightful owner while I retire to my domain to PONDER what I have learned today!

BEN: SHEESH! That guy must rack up a bundle of frequent flyer miles!

RAIDER: Not FAREWELL, "Old Friend", but 'TIL WE MEET AGAIN -- for you and I are not FINISHED yet!

Small panel showing EMNU and the other two WATCHERS intently observing the spherical hologram.

EMNU: NOW WE BEGIN!

Panel 1:

The RAIDER sarcastically addresses SUE STORM, who is still holding him prisoner in her force field. BEN and FRANKLIN stand on either side of her. In the background, we find BLACK PANTHER, HUNTARA, DEVLOR and VIBRAXAS, the last two still recovering from their bruising enconter with the RAIDER.

RAIDER: You've always been such a MAWKISH fool, dearest "wife" --

RAID (CNTD): -- But my mission TRANSCENDS your petty morality -- and NO ONE, not even YOU, must be allowed to stand in my way!

SUE: Reed, PLEASE! Don’t force us to...

Emphasis on BEN challenging the RAIDER.

BEN: Yeah? What're ya gonna do? From where I sit, we've got ya pretty much penned up!

RAIDER: You orange-brick gargoyle! For all the years you've fought alongside your Reed Richards, have you ever known him not to have a CONTINGENCY PLAN?

RAID (CNTD): What makes you think I am LESS than he?

The RAIDER activates a hidden stud on his utility belt. FRANKLIN who has already divined his gesture (without fully realizing its meaning) steps forward in a vain attempt to stop him.

FRANK: STOP HIM! He's going to --

RAIDER: TOO LATE, young fool!

A swirling, kaleidoscopic bubble envelops the RAIDER (whose silhouette stands defiantly at its center). The silhouettes of SUE, FRANKLIN and BEN are trapped in various action poses along its edges. This is the release of a probability-warping bubble, so you can add whatever weird-looking effects (overlay, ziptones, etc.) strike your fancy.

RAIDER: BON VOYAGE, FANTASTIC FOUR! HA! HA! HA!

The PANTHER, HUNTARA and the others look in awe at the very spot where the F.F. stood a second ago -- and which is now empty.

HUNTARA: Psi-Lord? Where are you?

VIBRAXAS: PANTHER! Where have they gone? What happened?

PANTHER: THAT, Vibraxas, was the release of a probability-warping bubble of UNKNOWN magnitude...

PANTHER: If what I suspect is true, our friends have been FORCIBLY dragged on a JOURNEY BEYOND HUMAN KEN --

Panel 6:
Smaller panel. CLOSE-UP on the PANTHER's face.

PANTHER: -- A JOURNEY FROM WHICH THEY MAY NEVER RETURN!

Panel 1:

SUE, BEN and FRANKLIN are tumbling, turning and twisting like leaves in the wind. They are in one of those mind-boggling "alien dimensions" that Kirby used to illustrate with collages, etc. It is an endless nexus of probabilities, a crossroad of alternate realities, a cosmic roulette wheel. You might consider using a collage of previous WHAT IFs, but do it unobtrusively so that it doesn't detract from the characters in the foreground.

BEN: What in Sam Hill happened? Do you know WHERE we are, kid?

FRANK: I think I do -- but you're NOT going to like the answer!

BEN: Skip the hallmark moment, willya, and give your momma and me the straight dope!

More of the same, but from a different angle. Also, vary the background.

FRANK: When the RAIDER left our dimension, he created a field of NULL-SPACE which caught us in its wake! Like being dragged into the tail of a comet --

FRAN (CNTD): -- Then, he dumped us in this CROSSROADS OF REALITIES!

BEN: SHEESH! Now I know what a used kleenex feels like! You sure know how to make a guy feel good, kiddo!

SUE: You mean, we're stranded forever in the WORLDS OF WHAT IF?

The same, with an emphasis on FRANKLIN, looking fairly depressed.

FRANK: Not IN, mother, much worse -- BETWEEN worlds!

FRANK: He's condemned us to watch this endless KALEIDOSCOPE of probabilities, forever and powerless -- until we GO MAD!

The same, with an emphasis on SUE.

SUE: Powerless, NEVER! Franklin! If we combine our powers,we can stabilize and PHASE into a world -- ANY WORLD!
SUE (CNTD): From there, we've at least got a CHANCE of getting home! Can you DO it?

FRANK: Yes... We can TRY!

The same, with an emphasis on BEN. FRANKLIN, who has already linked his right arm with SUE’s, is extending his left (or vice-versa) towards BEN.

FRANK: Link up with me, Uncle Ben!

BEN: Don't make me sound like a blamed box of rice, kid --

BEN (CNTD): -- Just pick a good world!

Panel 6:
The same swirling effect surrounds the three HEROES as they start phasing into an alternate reality.

BEN: Don't drop us from the blankety-blank fryin' pan --

SUE, FRANKLIN and BEN rematerialize in front of the LINCOLN MEMORIAL in Washington D.C. -- except that it's not Washington D.C. For a start, instead of the statue of Lincoln, the monument houses a statue of -- the HIGH EVOLUTIONARY. Also, the sparse crowd among which they have just rematerialized is composed of BEAST-MEN of WUNDAGORE, dressed in sci-fi/medieval outfits, but obviously tourists. If you have room in the panel, you can even draw a KNIGHT OF WUNDAGORE or two on their flying mechanical steeds in the background in the sky.

BEN (BURST): -- INTO THE FIRE?!

Panel 1:

The crowd of BEAST-MEN have given the three HEROES a wide berth -- as would any group of tourists on our world if three such "aliens" were to appear among them. BEN, SUE and FRANKLIN are looking around in awe, surprise, puzzlement.

BEN: Sheesh! I HATE soundin' like a broken record but -- WHERE in Sam Hill are we this time, kid?

FRANK: I -- I don't know...

SUE: This statue -- where the Lincoln Memorial used to be -- It’s... the HIGH EVOLUTIONARY!?

SUE (CNTD): But WHY? HOW?

CLOSE-UP on BEN turning as he hears someone shouting OFF-PANEL.

OFF-PANEL: STOP, Monkey Man! In the name of WUNDAGORE, STOP!

BEN (BURST): HUH?

PROF. GAMBLE (see reference), who was obviously running away from the still unseen pursuers and not looking where he was going, collides with BEN.

SFX: WHOOMF!

BEN: HEY! Can't ya watch where yer goin', pipsqueak?!

BEN takes a good, hard look at GAMBLE: he is a MAN, not an ANIMAL! GAMBLE dusts off his hat which fell when he bumped into BEN. He is still out of breath.

GAMBLE: I beg -- Puff! -- your pardon -- Puff! -- my good sir! Puff!

BEN: But... But... Yer an ordinary guy?

GAMBLE: Hardly, but I'll take that as a compliment. And you, if I'm not mistaken, are the THING, of the fabled FANTASTIC FOUR?

GAM (CNTD): Oh, my! This must be my LUCKY DAY!

BEN, SUE and FRANKLIN surround GAMBLE, who is pointing behind him (off-panel).

BEN: Yeah? Wish I could say the same, shorty! Who're ya, and what're ya doin' here?

BEN (CNTD): And where's here anyway?

GAMBLE: I think I understand your predicament, and I'll be too happy to HELP if you could, er, CONVINCE these gentlemen that our disagreement is only a MILD MISUNDERSTANDING!

FRANK: What "gentlemen"?

Four very fierce-looking KNIGHTS OF WUNDAGORE, armed to the teeth with rayguns, are facing our heroes. Their leader is HAUKK (he's evolved from a hawk). The other three are TIGRAX, CROC and GORILLAR (make the latter very big), respectively evolved from a tiger, a crocodile and a gorilla.

HAUKK (BURST): SURRENDER THE INTERLOPER, OR FACE THE WRATH OF THE KNIGHTS OF WUNDAGORE!!

Panel 1:

An in-your-face close confrontation between BEN and GAMBLE, so close that the latter's hat brim is being crunched under the THING's rocky eyebrows.

BEN: Yer innocent?

GAMBLE: Yes!

BEN: Can ya take us home?

GAMBLE: Yes!

BEN: That's good enough fer me!

Larger shot. BEN has pushed GAMBLE behind him and now waves a defiant arm towards the KNIGHTS. SUE is trying to catch his attention by putting her hand on his other arm.

BEN: COME AN’ GET ‘IM, BIRD-BRAIN!

SUE: Ben, NO! Don't you think that we should TALK--

The four KNIGHTS lunge forward to meet the THING. FRANKLIN materializes his armor, turning into PSI-LORD. GAMBLE in the background watches the scene with a concerned look on his face.

HAUKK (BURST): ATTACK, MY KNIGHTS!

TIGRAX: IN THE NAME OF OUR SIRE --

TIGR (CNTD): -- DEATH TO YON MISCREANTS!

BEN: IT'S CLOBBERIN' TIME!

GAMBLE (SMALL PRINT): Oh dear dear -- if only --

SUE and BEN are tackling CROC and TIGRAX. SUE has managed to trap CROC in her force field. BEN is delivering a mighty punch to TIGRAX.

SUE: If I remember what THOR once told me, this must be a world where the HIGH EVOLUTIONARY succeeded * and Earth is now ruled by his BEAST-MEN...BEN: Yeah! I always said Goldilocks was OVERRATED!

FTNOTE: * : Way back when in THOR #134 -- ED.

TIGRAX is down for the count, but GORILLAR has jumped from behind and grabbed BEN in a mighty squeeze.

BEN: That's more like it! I LOVE tacklin' guys my own size!

BEN (CNTD): He even makes Aunt Petunia's favorite nephew looks like Tom Cruise!

GOR: Foolish monstrosity! Thou art not fighting one of thy brother trolls, but GORILLAR, noble SCION OF WUNDAGORE!

BEN: SHEESH! He even TALKS like Goldilocks!

Panel 1:

FRANKLIN (in his PSI-LORD armor) is trying to blast HAUKK, who is swooping over him -- the way HAWKMAN fights villains.

FRANK: We don't WANT to fight you guys --

FRAN (CNTD): -- We'd just like a CHANCE TO EXPLAIN --

HAUKK: Thy actions BELIE thy words, stripling, and certainly thou hast POWER beyond compare --

Panel 2:
From above, HAUKK has dropped a fancy-looking net made of micro-circuitry on FRANKLIN, who writhes as the net drains his armor of energy.

HAUKK: -- But it be HAUKK OF WUNDAGORE that thou doest defy!

FRANK: All my ENERGY! It's being SIPHONED OFF by that net!

FRANK: I can NO LONGER hold my armor in this dimension!

Panel 3:
FRANKLIN's armor disappears with an energy discharge. He's now back to being a normal human, still trapped under the net. Above, HAUKK is preparing to strike him.

FRAN (BURST): AARGH!

HAUKK: Thy defeat was INEVITABLE, youth! PREPARE TO --

Panel 4:
Suddenly, one of SUE's force fields blasts in from OFF-PANEL and knocks HAUKK down, just as he was about to smite FRANKLIN.

HAUKK (BURST): -- SQUAKKK!

FRANKLIN thanks SUE. HAUKK, TIGRAX and CROC are now down on the ground. BEN is still grappling with GORILLAR, who is sweating bullets.

FRANK: Thanks! If nothing else, these last few weeks have been quite a LEARNING EXPERIENCE!

SUE: That's what MOTHERS are for, Franklin!

SUE (CNTD): Now let's give your Uncle a HELPING HAND!

BEN: No need to! I'm almost --

Panel 6:
In a final burst of strength, BEN finishes off GORILLAR.

BEN: -- DONE WITH THE BIG APE!

GOR (BURST): ARRRH!

Panel 1:

Suddenly, the ghostly form of the HIGH EVOLUTIONARY appears in mid-air above the combatants. Favor PROF. GAMBLE in the foreground.

H.E.: HALT! What is the meaning of all this? I sensed a DISTURBANCE in the ether and --

H.E. (CNTD, BURST): GAMBLE??

GAMBLE: Hello, Herbert!

GAM (CNTD): I can still call you Herbert, can't I?

The H.E. turns towards his four KNIGHTS who are climbing back to their feet. GAMBLE and the F.F. stand on the other side.

H.E.: Of course, my friend.

H.E. (CNTD): SIR HAUKK, will you explain--?

HAUKK: But, Sire, the stranger STOLE a holy relic from thy Evolutionary Museum...

The H.E. has now turned back towards GAMBLE.

GAMBLE: I tried to tell them that it BELONGED to me, but you know your creatures, Herbert. They just WON'T listen!

H.E.: The FINGER OF NOLISSAR, eh? But it's been FOUR HUNDRED years -- why NOW?

GAMBLE: I've had other things on my mind. And you know what they say, Herbert, TIME FLIES!

Same scene, but favoring GAMBLE and BEN in the foreground.

H.E.: Very well. I won't inquire. I won't even ask what you're doing with two members of the long-vanished FANTASTIC FOUR...

BEN (SMALL PRINT): What does he mean, "long-vanished"?
GAMBLE (SMALL PRINT): HUSH!

H.E.: Go in peace, Timestrider!

The H.E. is gone. The four KNIGHTS shake hands with the F.F.

GAMBLE: WELL! I think that takes care of that!

HAUKK: Indeed it does. FARE THEE WELL, Sir Gamble --

HAUKK (CNTD): -- And farewell to thee also, Strangers. Thou hast been WORTHY adversaries, and will ALWAYS be welcome in WUNDAGORE!

BEN: Yeah, but don't get mad if we're NOT looking forward to a return visit!

GAMBLE is standing in front of a garden shed, holding the door open, inviting the F.F. to enter.

CAPTION: A few MINUTES later...

GAMBLE: This is my ship. Please enter, Fantastic Four!

FRANK: Ship? What ship?

Panel 1:

The F.F. find themselves inside an impossibly vast, surrealistically high-tech room, with a large, round viewscreen, consoles, doors leading god-knows-where, machines of all kinds, etc.

F.F. (BURST): !!!

GAMBLE: I owe you some explanations...

Medium Shot of GAMBLE talking to the F.F, favoring BEN.

GAMBLE: My name is PROFESSOR JUSTIN ALPHONSE GAMBLE; I once worked for the TIME VARIANT AUTHORITY...

BEN: I knew it! Another of Mobey's * big-domed bureaucrats!

GAMBLE: The person you're referring to is unknown to me, but I, er, RESIGNED from the T.V.A. a LONG time ago...

FTNOTE: * : See F.F. ANNUAL #27 -- ED.

A small panel featuring the three WATCHERS.

ATUL: This GAMBLE -- he is UNLIKE any other T.V.A. agent I have ever seen...

EMNU: Yes. Like us, he is UNIQUE, my brothers!

EMNU (CNTD): He will bear WATCHING in the future, but let us continue...

CLOSE UP on GAMBLE.

GAMBLE: I’m looking for the LOST FINGER OF NOLISSAR -- the T.V.A.’s ill-conceived attempt at duplicating GALACTUS’ ULTIMATE NULLIFIER...

GAMBLE: For reasons too long to go into right now, it was broken apart into THREE COMPONENTS, each entrusted to a powerful entity...

GAMBLE: I’ve just retrieved the first component from the HIGH EVOLUTIONARY and I need to find the other two!

Back to a MEDIUM SHOT of GAMBLE talking to the F.F., favoring SUE.

GAMBLE: If you agree to HELP me in this task, I’ll be HAPPY to take you home afterwards!

SUE: Do we have a choice?

GAMBLE: Er, not really. We're already on our way to meet with the SECOND keeper!

SFX: THUNKK!

GAMBLE: In fact, we've just LANDED!

Different angle, this time favoring BEN. On the viewscreen, we see a lugubrious, dark (night) landscape of ruins and desolation.

BEN: SHEESH! Who's the Keeper of yer Whatzit? DARTH VADER?

GAMBLE: Well, he DOES like the dark...

The F.F. and GAMBLE step outside (their backs to us) into a scene resembling a Christopher Lee DRACULA movie. Sitting on a throne is WOLVERINE, in his LORD OF THE VAMPIRES garb, cape included. At his side are vampiric versions of CYCLOPS, STORM, COLOSSUS and NIGHTCRAWLER.

STORM: ENTER FREELY AND OF YOUR OWN WILL. --

STORM: -- AND BOW BEFORE

STORM (CNTD, USE LOGO): #9; WOLVERINE, LORD OF ALL VAMPIRES! *

WOLV: Yup.

FTNOTE: * : See WHAT IFs # 24 & #37 -- ED.

Panel 1:

BEN looks amazed at seeing his pal WOLVERINE turned into a vampire.

SUE: WOLVERINE?

BEN: LOGAN??

WOLV: That's LORD LOGAN to you, GRIMM!

WOLVERINE turns towards GAMBLE.

WOLV: Why have you brought them with you?

WOLV: The FANTASTIC FOUR were among the FIRST I sentenced to the true death death from which none awaken, when we vampires rose to power over a hundred years ago.

GAMBLE: Well, I...er... I...

BEN steps forward, hands clenched in fists, ready to clobber. COLOSSUS moves to intercept him. SUE tries to hold the THING back.

BEN: You STINKIN’ leech! Ya mean to tell me ya fanged us...

SUE: Calm down, BEN, this isn’t our reality!

COL: No mere human threatens our LORD!

BEN: Who ya callin’ "mere", ya bloodsucker!?

GAMBLE holds out his hands in a pacifying gesture.

GAMBLE: THING, WAIT! We haven’t come here to fight with LORD WOLVERINE...

BEN: We haven't?

GAMBLE: No. He has the second portion of the FINGER, and has offered to exchange it for my help against a HORRIBLE enemy...

BEN: WORSE than vampires?

Panic strikes as huge metallic cables, each terminating with the equivalent of a human-like face (like the water creature in THE ABYSS), equipped with pointy teeth and wormlike, metal "hair", crash into the throne room. They are led by a creature whose face is that of CABLE. Others bear the likeness of BISHOP and members of the EXTERNALS, while still other faces are merely blank templates.

WOLV: MUCH worse, Bub!! We’re angels compared to --

WOLV (CNTD, BURST): -- THE CABLE HOOKUPS!!

PAGE 14

(Note to Letterer: Have the CABLE CREATURES speak with square balloons and computer style lettering.)

The maw of the CABLE CREATURE, swallows the upper half of NIGHTCRAWLER’s body.

CABLE: You might as well SURRENDER to the inevitable, X-VAMPIRES! My dominion grows ever LARGER with each passing hour!

NIGHT (WAVY): NO! NO! AIEEEE!

CYCLOPS’ optic beam slashes the cable of the CABLE CREATURE.

CYKE: You’re a CANCER on the face of this planet, Nathan! I RUE the day you returned from your hellish future to spread your ABOMINATION!

CABLE: You should talk, Father D -- !!

SFX: ZZTAK!!

Another of the cable creatures assumes NIGHTCRAWLER’s face, while another CABLE enters from behind.

NIGHT: I belong, at last! I belong to -- CABLE!

CABLE: -- Dear! You turned your precious humanity into CHATTEL!

WOLVERINE jumps into the fray, slashing and hacking at CABLE!

WOLV: At least, under vampire rule, Men kept their INDIVIDUALITY!

WOLV (CNTD): You leave them with nothing -- but bleak, cold, unfeeling METAL!

CABLE: You VAMPIRES stand for DEATH and DECAY, while I bring mankind the harmony and ETERNAL ORDER it has always longed for!

The F.F. and GAMBLE watch the abominable battle in the b.g., horrified.

BEN: You mean, we have a choice between DRACULA and AT&T?

GAMBLE: FREEDOM is always the best option, Mr. GRIMM.

BEN: Even if it means turnin’ into a BAT?

Panel 1:

GAMBLE gives a small, round metallic gadget to BEN. On its underside is a suction cup.

GAMBLE: Be that as it may, you need to attach this device to CABLE’s forehead if we want WOLVERINE to give us the FINGER...

BEN: You don’t say!

The three F.F. rush forward, BEN and the forefront and FRANKLIN in his PSI-LORD armor (surrounded by energy flakes to show that he has just summoned it).

BEN: If this’s the ONLY way to get home, we ain’t got no choice --

BEN (CNTD): -- IT’S CLOBBERIN’ TIME!!

SUE: Take care of CABLE, BEN...

SUE keeps the other HOOKUPS at bay behind a force field. Favor the BISHOP HOOKUP in the foreground.

SUE: ...While I keep the rest of them busy!

BISH: Hookup on Cable, INVISIBLE WOMAN! Reach out and touch someone!

SUE: After what happened to NIGHTCRAWLER, I don’t think I’ll EVER be able to look at a telephone in quite the same way!

SUE (CNTD): Good thing there’s no way you can BREAK through my force field!

PSI-LORD and CYCLOPS combine their powers to blast several of the HOOKUPS.

HOOK: HISSS!

FRAN: Whatever these things are, they hate IONIC ENERGY!

FRA (CNTD): Still, I’m only managing to keep them at bay. I can’t DESTROY them!

CYKE: But I (bold) can, MORTAL!

SFX: ZZ-AXX!

The THING jumps onto CABLE’s back, the way CONAN usually jumps on the backs of giant snakes. WOLVERINE is still slashing at the creature’s side.

BEN: So, the pint-sized DRACULA’s bitten off more’n he can chew, huh?!

WOLV: You ain’t got no funnier in a hundred years, GRIMM! I’m almost sorry I don’t get to kick your butt at poker any more!

CABLE: You two will be welcome additions to my NETWORK!

BEN: Too bad I’ve decided to CANCEL my subscription!

Panel 1:

CABLE twists and turns in an attempt to dislodge BEN, while WOLVIE holds the jaws of the creature open to avoid being swallowed.

BEN: Why’d you decide to off me, instead of makin’ me one of yer BAT BRIGADE?

WOLV: Being LORD OF THE VAMPIRES ain’t all it’s cracked up to be BEN...

WOL (CNTD): I knew someone as PIG-HEADED as you wouldn’t be easy to control!

Panel 2:
The THING finally slaps the device on CABLE’s forehead.

BEN: THERE! Now let’s hope the PROF’s gizmo does its thing!

With a radiating wave of energy, CABLE’s face screams.

CABLE: EMERGENCY! INTERFERENCE DETECTED!

CABLE: LOSING SIGNAL! EMERGENCY!

CABLE’s face has disappeared. The end of the tentacle is now blank.

CABLE: EMERG --

A long shot of all the heroes standing together amongst all the dead tentacles sprawled over the ground. WOLVERINE and GAMBLE are exchanging devices.

WOLV: A promise is a promise. Here’s what you came for, PROF!

GAMBLE: The WAVE SCRAMBLER will give your forces time to regroup, LORD WOLVERINE!

BEN, SUE and FRANKLIN are inside GAMBLE’s ship. The PROFESSOR’s face bears a crestfallen expression.

CAP: Soon after...

GAMBLE: This should show us our FINAL destination -- OH NO!

BEN: What place could be WORSE than that creepshow we just left?

GAMBLE: One where your very SANITY could be at stake!

This is a typical JOHN CARTER OF MARS or CONAN THE BARBARIAN splash or cover illo. The hero, in this case a duck à la HOWARD, is standing amidst a pile of bodies, swinging a broadsword while be set upon by hordes of fierce, barbaric opponents. These are green, frog-like, humanoids. The more clichéd the scene, the better.

PHROG: There can be no escape this time, Duck! YOU MUST DIE!!

JOHN: SPAWNS OF HELL! It will take more than PHROGS to kill --

JOHN (CNTD, USE LOGO PATTERNED AFTER THAT OF "JOHN CARTER, WARLORD OF MARS): -- JOHN CANARD, MALLARD OF MARS!

Panel 1:

SUE and FRANKLIN look upon the scene with an air of profound incredulity, while BEN has turned his head in the opposite direction to call/scream at GAMBLE.

Note to Letterer: The words "Ducks" and "Frogs" should be in small letters with lots of white space around them to convey the characters surprise.

SUE: Ducks?

FRAN: Frogs?

BEN: GAMBLE!! C’MERE!!

CLOSE-UP of BEN and GAMBLE arguing.

BEN: You have ten seconds to explain, little geezer!

GAMBLE: You humans’ SPECIESISTIC CENTRISM never ceases to astound me! After all you’ve seen, do you really think that MONKEYS are the ONLY intelligent race in the universe?

GAM (CNTD): -- Or even the SMARTEST?

JOHN CANARD is hacking away at the PHROGS, making mincemeat out of them.

JOHN: Get your filthy phrog phlippers OFF me! I said -- OFF!

JOHN: I want your MASTER -- not his tadpoles!

JOHN (CNTD): I want -- BATRAKAS, the so-called PHROG-EMPEROR OF MARS!!

Outside GAMBLE’s ship, which now looks like a regular flying saucer. In the foreground, GAMBLE points to the battle taking place off-panel. In the background, a MYSTERIOUS HUMANOID SHAPE is seen entering the ship. (This is important!)

GAMBLE: We just need to wait five more minutes. BATRAKAS has the third and LAST component of the FINGER OF NOLISSAR --

GAMBLE: -- And CANARD will get it for us!

Having killed all the PHROG warriors, JOHN brandishes his sword and defies BATRAKAS, who has just come out of his palace. He looks like a mean, wizened, old frog and holds what is obviously the third component of the FINGER in his hand.

JOHN: AT LAST YOU REVEAL YOURSELF FIEND!

BAT: You are a FOOL, Drake! And, like all fools, EASILY disposed of!

A BLAST comes from the FINGER and strikes JOHN CANARD who writhes in its light.

JOHN (BURST): WAUGH!!

Panel 1:

GAMBLE, addressing himself to BEN, is pointing to the PHROG, who holds JOHN CANARD imprisoned in the FINGER’s beam.

GAMBLE: This is your chance, Mr. Grimm. Go and, er, "CLOBBER" the Phrog on the head!

BEN does.
SFX: WHAM!

A recovered JOHN CANARD is thanking BEN.

JOHN: Thank you, ORANGE ONE! I am indebted to you for rescuing me. Because of you, the people of EGGIUM will at last know peace!

BEN: Er, yer welcome yer duckship!

Small panel as GAMBLE prepares to recover the FINGER component from the hand of the fallen wizard.

GAMBLE: And now I have the third...

A hand (owner yet unseen) grabs it before GAMBLE can.

RAIDER: NOT YET!!

A LARGER PANEL revealing the DARK RAIDER holding something that looks like a BIZARRO version of GALACTUS’ ULTIMATE NULLIFIER.

BALLOON (OFF PANEL): The DARK RAIDER!!

SAME: REED!

Panel 1:

The RAIDER gloats to the gathered heroes.

RAIDER: When I saw you had ESCAPED the fate I had in store for you, I FOLLOWED you. After you met up with this T.V.A. meddler...

GAMBLE (SMALL PRINT): I'm NOT a meddler--

RAID (CNTD): ...My curiosity was piqued. I had heard about the lost FINGER OF NOLISSAR. Since you had stolen my UNIVERSAL NULLIFIER, I decided to let you REPLACE it for me

More of the same, change the angle.

RAIDER: I snuck into GAMBLE’s ship and STOLE the first two segments. Now I can AT LAST achieve my dream!

GAMBLE: NO! YOU MUSTN’T! YOU CAN’T--!

RAIDER: With the FINGER, who is going to stop me, renegade ? You? This helpless trio? This -- DUCK?

CLOSE-UP on GAMBLE pleading.

GAMBLE: You DON’T understand, Mr. RICHARDS. Unlike Galactus, NOLISSAR was MAD. That’s why the T.V.A. DISCARDED his creations, burying them in the most OUTLANDISH dimensions...

BEN and JOHN CANARD rush to attack the RAIDER.

BEN: Don’t worry, PROF! Me an’ the DUCK’ll get yer gizmo back in a jiffy!

JOHN: This villain shall NOT thwart us!

The RAIDER releases a powerful explosion which sends the two heroes flying.

RAIDER: You FOOLS!

SFX: WHAMM!

CLOSE-UP on the FINGER OF NOLISSAR itself, held in the RAIDER’s hand.

FINGER: AT LAST! I LIVE AGAIN!

Panel 1:

GAMBLE, who is, mysteriously, the only one still standing, gathers the heroes and points towards the open door of the ship.

GAMBLE: Goodness! Get inside the ship!

GAMBLE (CNTD): You, too, JOHN CANARD!

BEN (SMALL PRINT): How come the little fella’s still standin’?

SUE: Why? Shouldn’t we stay to STOP the RAIDER?

GAMBLE: There’s NO MORE time! HURRY!

The FINGER, which is now being held with difficulty by the RAIDER, who is holding on with both hands, is radiating corruscating waves of energy.

FINGER: HAPPY! HAPPY! JOY! JOY! #9;
RAIDER: Power! TOO MUCH POWER--

There is a gigantic explosion. This is an entire universe getting pulverized, so make it look impressive.

[NO COPY.]

Inside GAMBLE’s ship, the faces of the heroes reflect the tragedy they have just witnessed.

GAMBLE: He didn’t realize the FINGER itself was ALIVE -- and like its creator -- quite, quite MAD! That’s why I was looking for it. To DESTROY it, of course.
JOHN: My entire universe -- GONE! Snuffed like a candle!

BEN: GOSH!

Panel 1:

On top of the Baxter Building. The three F.F. climb down from GAMBLE’s ship, which looks like a water tower. GAMBLE looks as if he is standing on a ledge inside the tower.

CAP: LONGER than an eternity, yet SHORTER than the space of a breath later...

GAMBLE: I’m as good as my word. You’re home!

SUE, BEN and FRANKLIN watch the water tower disappear.

SUE: I was wrong to stop the WATCHER from killing the DARK RAIDER. If I’d let him go on, a universe would have been SAVED!

BEN: You couldn’t have known, Suzie. You only did what you THOUGHT was right!

They walk towards the rooftop entrance.

FRAN: It doesn’t really matter. It all comes to the SAME in the end. The RAIDER is dead at last!SUE: It DOES matter, FRANKLIN! Another universe is DEAD because of us!

The three WATCHERS are observing SUE in the hologram.

ATUL: The Earthwoman's words ring TRUE.

EMNU: Let us not forget that what we have seen was but a SIMULACRUM!

EMNU (CNTD): In the TRUE reality, GAMBLE found the FINGER without the humans’ help and the duckling universe did NOT perish!

Panel 5:

The WATCHERS. Change the angle.

INGU: But it would have -- had UATU not INTERVENED and KILLED the DARK RAIDER!

ATUL: Perhaps our Oath has TOO HIGH a cost?

The WATCHERS. Change the angle.

EMNU: We must REFLECT...CAP: FINIS?