EARTH-19828 (EARTH-THE MARVEL PRODUCTION CREW EXISTED IN THIS REALITY & THE MARVEL EDITORIAL CREW DID, TOO)
Type: Alternate Earth
Environment: Earth-like
Usual means of access:Presumably vibrational attunement
Dominant Life Form: Humans
Significant Inhabitants: The Marvel Editorial Crew (Michael Carlin, Tom DeFalco, Danny Fingeroth, Linda Grant, Mark Gruenwald, Louise Jones, Ralph Macchio, Allen Milgrom, Ann Nocenti, Denny O'Neil, Jim Salicrup, Lance Tooks), the Marvel Production Crew (Joe Albelo, Eliot R. Brown, Bob Camp, Harry Candelario, Rob Carosella, Danny Crespi, Morrie Kuramoto, Nora Maclin, John Morelli, Rick Parker, Barry Shapiro, Ron Zalme)
First Appearance: What If? I#34 (August, 1982)
History:
(What If? I#34/37) - The Marvel Production Crew & Editorial Crew produced
& edited some of the greatest comic books in the known universe.
Each of the Production Crew were well-known in their own ways, such as:
"Ron Zalme (production supervisor)-compulsive doodler; doodles
at weddings & bar mitzvahs; aspiring tattoo artist & child
photographer.
Joe Albelo (Crazy magazine art director)-sells advertising space on
dirty windshields; converts roach motels into condominiums; sells jelly donuts
to minors.
Rob Carosella (photostat operator) - stand-up comic in fast food restaurant;
stand-in for Stunt-Man; answers mail for junk-food manufacturer.
John Morelli (lettering corrections) - role model for aspiring juvenile
delinquents; actor in Old Spice commercials; cabin boy onboard Staten Island
Ferry.
Bob Camp (art changes) - professional fly-breeder; has world's largest collection
of tacky Hawaiian shirts.
Barry Shapiro (magazine production) - consultant to deli chain; extra in
light beer commercials; middleman for scrap-metal dealer.
Rick Parker (lettering corrections) - vagrant; sleeps on back seats of used
cars; pries lost heel-plates from city streets for sale to scrap-metal
dealer.
Danny Crespi (production manager) - professional worrier; ulcer candidate;
universal sympathizer; specialty: high-stress companionship.
Nora Maclin (magazine design) - caviar tester; art patron; flower arrangement
by appointment!
Morrie Kuramoto (pastes up letter columns) - handwriting analyst; channels
donations from charitable institutions to needy individuals; runs B-B guns
to warring youth gangs.
Eliot R. Brown (type-setter) - designs & builds giant telescopes for
armchair astronomers; runs an apartment referral service for peeping
toms!
Harry Candelario (photostat operator) - guardian angel impersonator; runs
senior-citizen escort service; road-tests wheel-barrows for
manufacturer."
The Editorial
Crew was also well-known for:
"Denny O'Neil (editor) - dresses salads formally; has a black
belt in his closet; highest-paid miss-men for the mafia; likes green gelatin;
once gave a dime loafer to a pan handler for a cup of coffee!
Mark Gruenwald (editor) - brushes teeth with Cheez Wiz; has lost the human
race; works as smooth as a well-oiled salad; part-time bell-clapper; is complex
yet simple & wore an antennae for his wedding reception.
Jim Salicrup (editor) - known to close friends as F. Scott Tissue; sells
both seeds & grit for neat prizes; wears deck shoes; wants a hurricane
named after him & has no cartilage.
Michael Carlin (assistant ed) - not really an assistant, but an incredible
simulation; is "into" styrofoam underwear; has a pair of shoe-tip wings;
gleefully awaits puberty & likes to drink "lots of soder."
Louise Jones (editor) - is really Nancy Drew; wears her daughter's clothes;
knows the difference between an alligator & a crocodile; can turn door-knobs
with one hand; likes to drink from a dribble glass!
Danny Fingeroth (editor) - has delusions of adequacy; is called "Bigfoot"
because he thinks there are thirteen inches in a foot; wears water polo shirts;
lost the rat race; denies being the Bizarro Jim Salicrup & is the Bizarro
Bob Budiansky.
Ralph Macchio (assistant ed) - poses for pizza boxes & florist logos;
has a pool-shaped kidney; uses his own feet as a back-scratcher; sings in
the bathysphere; also known as "K. D." (Kiss of Death); has survived a record
six editors & is hard at work on number seven!
Allen Milgrom (editor) - resident volleyball inspector; often mistaken for
Allen Funt; collects argyle socks; licensed to drive a hard bargain; likes
his eggs sunny-side down!
Ann Nocenti (assistant ed) - whistles rap records; breeds hush puppies; enjoys
reading words; is the author of her diary; knows the formula for feline mcnuggets
& the dirty lyrics to the "Brady Bunch" Theme Song.
Lance Tooks (assistant ed) - can whistle in six different languages; is a
stand-in for wildlife documentaries; hates crackers; has several hard feelings;
collects sticks of gum & likes to chew baseball cards!
Linda Grant (assistant ed) - actually knows the second verse of "Inagadda
da vida;" knows who's buried in Grant's tomb; invented imitation polyester;
knits pot-roasts & collects record albums by famous panto-mime
artists!
Tom DeFalco (editor) - 'I edited this issue of What If...& nya! nya!
I don't have to subject myself to this foolishness!'"
Comments: Created by Rick Parker, Michael Carlin, Ron Zalme, Joe Albelo, Rob Carosella, John Morelli, Bob Camp, Barry Shapiro, Danny Crespi, Nora Maclin, Morrie Kuramoto, Eliot R. Brown, and Harry Candelario.
This reality was an alternate Earth in which the real life Marvel Production & Editorial Crews existed in a world similar to Earth-616.
Profile by Proto-Man.
CLARIFICATIONS:
Earth-The Marvel Production Crew Existed in This Reality has no known connections
to
images: (without ads)
What If? I#34, p19, pans1-12 (The Marvel Production Crew, main
pic)
p20, pans1-12 (The Marvel Editorial Crew, 2nd pic)
Other Appearances:
What If? I#34 (August, 1982) - "What if the Marvel Production Crew Existed
in This Reality...& Not to Be Outdone...What if the Marvel Editorial
Crew Did, Too?" - Rick Parker (writer/artist - Production Crew section),
Michael Carlin (writer - Editorial Crew section), Ron Zalme, Joe Albelo,
Rob Carosella, John Morelli, Bob Camp, Barry Shapiro, Danny Crespi, Nora
Maclin, Morrie Kuramoto, Eliot R. Brown, Harry Candelario (artists - Production
Crew section)...the artists of the Editorial Crew section were withheld to
protect the guilty
Any Additions/Corrections? please let me know.
Last Updated: 08/16/04
Non-Marvel
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